metaphor | timotheories

Home Improvement (My New House and Other House Keeping Thoughts)

Posted on January 14, 2018 by Tim Kuefler

Where I came from, holding a door open for a stranger was absolutely necessary (especially the elderly), and minding your parents wishes at all times expected, but I also had the great privilege of choosing my career path, focusing on creative acts and experimenting with belief systems as I grew up.

A strange combination of conservative Christian roots and post-modern ideals indeed, dear readers.

Now, in case you are wondering what my interpretation of that lifestyle could possibly look like, I’ll start by telling you some of my thoughts on living life. I have strong tendencies towards moral relativism and pluralistic truth-finding, while my creative energy is highly self-referential and irreverent – this is likely why I gravitate towards satire. And satire is best represented in popular culture (in my humble opinion of course). Also, my humour is starkly dry, and I hate injustice of any kind, so satire lends itself well to those values. But on the other side of that coin, I am fiercely loyal to maintaining family traditions, believe in the importance of a cultivated education that never ends, and I will happily defend that etiquette, discipline, and spirituality have their place in properly developing a human being. Even more-so as I step off the singles ledge and into the deep-end of parenthood.

It might seem contradictory to have those combination of beliefs, but I think of it this way, we should carve out what doesn’t work, always holding onto the core pieces that give us structure.

Also, there is an old adage about sweeping your own front door before you sweep the entryways of others, which make perfect sense to me. It’s a universal truth about minding your own business, that we shouldn’t assume to know the first thing about someone. We live in a world today that is very quick to judge or pass judgment on others without looking at ourselves first. We are quick to judge people based on gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity, how they make an income, what their income level is, based on where they live and even based on their past life experiences.

But life is way too involving to waste time and energy on what other people are working through. I really can’t see how you would ever run out of things to do to improve yourself, which is likely why I happen to think of houses as marvellous objects and excellent metaphors for change.

Tool Time

As you may know, I’ve been making lots of changes to this brand ever since I started this timotheories business back in November 2014, and for many, it seems like a natural progression to buy property after a certain period of time renting a space. Many people rent for a few years and then pick up a mortgage when they’ve tucked enough savings away.

I decided to to buy a property too. But I did it because I want to have more freedom over my daily life

Buying a house meant finding a mortgage broker who would approve a loan, searching through hundreds of listings, and then viewing more then twenty of them, before finally making an offer. After I put my offer on the table, I was approved. Which meant I could move forward with the next step – I had an inspection of the property done, I put down a deposit, worked with my insurance company to set up the house insurance, got the lawyer to draw up some paperwork on the sale of the house, and finally closed on the deal.

As I mentioned already, I bought this particular house for a few reasons, one of which was to convert the bi-level bungalow property into two rental units. And I’ve already started that process by replacing the old furnaces and hot water tank with brand new energy efficient models. You see creative cuties, I want to rent both properties and luckily the house came with two furnaces; furnaces that were 20 years old mind you. So rather then continue a string of repairs and having to coordinate with handymen, I signed up for a lifetime warranty plan and replaced those machines. That way I can just give any heating and plumbing concerns over to Always Heating and Plumbing whenever a tenant has an issue. For free. No surprise bills, and the annual maintenance schedule should help keep them alive for many years.

theories Summarized

I also want to pay off the house faster, and turn the house into a source of passive income. That way, if either Mysticque and I lose our jobs, we still have money coming in which could be used to buy another property, build a studio over the garage of our primary residence, or any number of big expenses. It’s a lot of work, but as I’ve said before, home improvement is essential if you want to make a difference in this world. You work with what you’ve been given, but each of us has an opportunity to improve on what came before, by mixing the old and the new.

And if you can keep up that habit, you’ll find you don’t even have time look at your neighbours house, let alone try to sweep up their front step. Leave that mess to the Jones’ and start planning to put in your hot tub instead. Just a theory to consider.

Tim!

Fly Like An Eagle (Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds, Who Built the Moon review)

Posted on December 4, 2017 by Tim Kuefler

If you love something, you should let it go, and if it returns it was meant to be.

A fitting line for this new album by the infamous Noel Gallagher, and his High Flying Birds, and consequently my return to the high-paced world of popular culture and social media. What have I been up to, you ask?Well dear readers, it wouldn’t be right to derail this album review with tales of my personal life, thusly we’ll just have to save that for a later post this week, perhaps something in the realm of a Timely Thursday?

Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds – Who Built the Moon?

released November 24, 2017
******* 7/10

Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds (NGHFB) are an English alt rock band comprised of… surprise, surprise, Noel Gallagher, and… a bunch of other people. It’s actually kind of confusing to list off the members of NGHFB. After reading the liner notes of this album and then looking into the history of the group, it seems the dominant figures of the recording sessions were Noel Gallagher on vocals and guitar, Jason Falkner on bass, Jeremy Stacey on drums, and Keefus Cianda on keyboards.

But it turns out that NGHFB is mostly about Noel Gallagher and a response to the breakup of legendary britpop supergroup Oasis. So while Who Built The Moon is the fourth studio album for Noel and his birds, if we are being perfectly honest with ourselves, then it’s mostly a Noel show, featuring guests.

Like Jesus!

And Santa!

Just kidding folks. But that Christmas pun was so perfectly placed, I couldn’t help myself.

Much like the timing of this album release and brother Liam’s As You Were – I can’t believe it was just over a month ago. Though it remains to be seen which record is better (Liam has gone to number one on the UK charts), I’m putting my money on Noel, as he has taken his sound further and built off of the success of Oasis post- (What’s The Story) Morning Glory? Who Built The Moon is a test to see if we can remember how great the 90s were for pop music, and remarkably it gets a passing grade.

Fort Knox, Holy Mountain and Black & White Sunshine all call back to rock bands of history like The Beatles and The Rolling Stones. Of course, Noel has always been quite capable of channeling these voices, and while the group Metric once asked the eternal question of who was cooler, Noel has proven, it’s your decision on who you want to be.

This biting cynicism shows up in various places, Be Careful What You Wish For comes to mind, but we also get postive vibes on Keep On Reaching and The Man Who Built the Moon, the eponymous answer to the album’s question. Spoiler alert, it’s not what you think!

Pros: I cannot get over how much It’s A Beautiful World reminds me of a fleeting moment, albeit an anger-fueled one. And Dead in the Water will make an auditorium of 30-something males cry.

Cons: There are moments when it all feels like a spin cycle of rhyme; She Taught Me How To Fly embraces this wholeheartedly. And while some reviewers can’t seem to get enough of the instrumental tracks about Wednesday, I found them to be mostly fill.

Runtime: 48 minutes

Points of Interest: I found it really interesting that the standout track of the album, the acoustic number Dead in the Water, was a bonus track. A seeming after thought, but the intimacy of it and raw power is a delight to hear after the experimentations of earlier songs. The album really showcases how far this Gallagher has come from the good ol’ days of Oasis and Blur battles, and the heartbreaking never-ending story of Gallagher VS Gallagher. And bonus points to Noel for recruiting David Holmes as a producer on this record.

If the 90s are finally making a comeback, it only makes sense that britpop gets a taste of the limelight, and so we shall fly on the wings of these eagles. Hopefully no one gets burnt when we coast past the sun.

theories Summarized

We probably won’t see an Oasis reunion in the near future, but it is nice to see that both Gallagher brothers are churning out thoughtful albums, I only wonder if it’s all been a blur and we’ve already gotten the best we can from chaps like Noel. One of many theories.

Tim!

Grow Up And Blow Away (Your Image)

Posted on July 27, 2016 by Tim Kuefler

Growing up is hard to do.

Or to if I were to rip it off of a writer like E. E. Cummings, it takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. Which is why Peter Pan never did it, why Peter Pan syndrome is real, and it’s also why we don’t all get there.

Also, I’ve never been a large fan of this above meme, but you know what? This seems like an appropriate time to use it, after all, marketing is about communicating a message, and so I’m making a solid point with a message about dummies using a baby to be funny.

Real mature dummies. Way to devalue the importance of marketing.

Hold on a tick, timotheories, are you saying what we think you’re saying?

That’s right, we’re onto post number four in the Importance of Marketing series!

As I’ve already done a few times before, I should start us on the right track by clarifying what an image means in this instance. It could be a representation of the external, whether the form taken is that of a person or a thing. It could also be a metaphor. In most cases it usually means a physical likeness, which can be best demonstrated with a photograph, painting or sculpture.

But what about a mental representation? An idea? a conception? Especially given the weird quality that computers have which allow them to produce an image themselves. And thusly we arrive dear readers. I’m referring to your online image.

An online image is that which houses all of the internet related information available to the public about you, and it can be very unflattering. Your online image is a summation of characteristics and interactions you have with other members of the internet. Most of the interaction happens on forums, content channels, and digital vending machines, but regardless of what you do with your time online, each website builds a profile of who you are and what you do.

Which is why you should learn some basic online hygiene in order to take that road. Yes, I could teach you about branding related image elements, like your logo, mailing list, etc. But upon more reflection, it occurred to me that we can all benefit from the below first, and build up to that level of attention.

So here it is, a short(er) list of things you should do.

Regularly track your Google search results. Are you competing with someone else for name attention? What kinds of URL results come up when someone searches for you and are the results consistent with the image you want to have? Is someone else with the same name in the top results? If you set Google alerts, you can run interference on both positive and negative feedback whenever someone has something to say about you.
Buy all of the necessary social media names associated with your brand. For example, I have YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter locked up. Your personal URL needs to be in sync with your brand too, so look into that as well. Domain names are relatively inexpensive to acquire, and the internet is the future after all, so make a commitment now. And then make your email signature align – add all of the links.
Participate in the above mentioned online social and business related groups. That also includes LinkedIn, Google+, and other ones like ZoomInfo. Your goal is to structure your profiles, replies, and posts so that you can attract your target demographic and send a professional message about your expertise. By connecting with those who already do what you want to do or are on their way too, you’ll gain access to job openings, freelance opportunities, and networking events.
Blogging. I blog because I love it, but Google and other search engines love blogs too. The content is regularly updated, and as you participate in the culture, which means guest posting, commenting on other blogs with your handle, and sharing useful information. And reference other relevant blogs when you can because the community commitment makes all the difference. Of course, if you can fit your blog into a full-meal-deal website that showcases your career, achievements, and portfolio, all the better.
Share your expertise. That means participating in professional associations that have physical and online forums, and take advantage of their networking opportunities. If you go to Yahoo!, Google Groups, LinkedIn, Reddit or WikiAnswers, you’ll find lots of people that’ll appreciate your help. You should also write reviews of relevant books for online publishers like Amazon and Indigo. And of course don’t forget to link it to your personal brand.

But what do you think? Did I miss anything? Do you still never wanna grow up? I know it’s scary out there, but I have a theory that if you follow the above you’ll get where you need to go on your marketing journey. I’m out of theories for now friends, but I’ll see you tomorrow with something timely.

Tim!

Innovation Is A Work Of Art (Lisa Jones interview, Innovation)

Posted on April 24, 2016 by Tim Kuefler

Innovation is difficult.

It forces you to stretch yourself and expose yourself in ways that you never expected to. You make sacrifices too, which can feel like hot wax on bare skin. Painful, but that initial commitment makes the overall process less painful. Unless of course you delay. Then the wax cools and the hair pull hurts more than the first wax application.

Whether a fast or slow decision, you eventually do have to pull the hairs out… but the aesthetic benefit soon becomes apparent. You see, those hairs can grow, but it is only with focus and determination that we can shape them into a beautiful set of eyebrows, a glowing beard, or even with clean shaven legs.

Only then can we become a work of art.

This might seem like kind of a weird example to lead into this month’s AMAZING interview, and an amazing interview it is, but I promise the metaphor will make sense shortly. You see dear readers, true innovation doesn’t come from no where.

Even if a statement like “… [is] a work of art” sweeps the Twitterverse on a particular day or over the course of a week (April 15, 2016), someone spent the time crafting a public persona and was able to authenticate that statement and help make it noteworthy for millions. The masses are fickle, but the artist can be committed to innovation.

Yeah that “… [is] a work of art” actually did became a popular thing to tweet for a bit there. Whether I decide to make a great metaphor for growth and the beauty of humanity.

But, as I mentioned already, it’s not true innovation. And a work of art is steeped in more than just hair pull metaphors that suggest people’s bodies can simply be works of art on their own. Or can art do that?

Can art build off of what already exists, and cause self-reflection? Or better yet, cultural shifts?

That’s where episode 8 of timotheories interviews comes in.

Lisa Jones is a visual artist with abilities to rival the best of them – painting, drawing, sculpture, and printmaking. But she prefers to specializes in painting with oils. And she makes images through her own personal metaphors, both refining and simultaneously obliterating narratives and materials at the same.

She recognizes that becoming an artist and maintaining a practice requires a combination of effort, innovation through necessity, and building a future for herself that doesn’t include regular visits to the local watering hole.

But you should take a look at the interview for yourself, because it’s literally just below you. It’s my most innovative interview yet. I promise.

And as always, if you want to check out more timotheories interviews or the Cross Talk series please visit our YouTube channel. And please, please, please leave some comments and of course subscribe to both the blog and channel!

Please also check out Lisa’s website to see her portfolio and to contact her for her creative services.

And of course my sincerest thanks to Lisa for being lively, likeable, and legitimately lovely. See you tomorrow with a hymn worthy music review.

Tim!

Who Ya Gonna Call? (Cross Talk Ep. 3)

Posted on March 20, 2016 by Tim Kuefler

Spring is officially here dear readers! And that means it’s time for change, warmth, and appreciation. The circle of life, in all of it’s perfection. Death and rebirth.

If you want another less literal example, in the form of a metaphor, it’s like a phoenix rising from the ashes.

Frankly, it just feels good to step out of your home after a long winter; to remove those extra layers, and start spending time in nature – Maybe with a cool drink? Watching new life form from old, colour stem from the bland. Activity starts to peak all around and we get excited for the future.

How convenient then that this month’s Cross Talk episode is all about remakes in film. That’s right, we’re going to explore the depths of the film industry and discuss the supposed epidemic of movie remakes, how valuable they are, and whether or not Hollywood should give up the goose and get back to creativity.

As often is the case with assumption, there is a general sense from movie goers, that studios will cash in on successful franchises more often then they will venture outside and make a bet on a dark horse. That and the assumption that the general populace hates remakes.

Which is why Chris and I have decided to embrace the season and the hot topic of remakes with our atypical blend of humour, passion, and comfortability. We will ease you right in, much like a newborn, inviting you into the blossoming garden.

Okay, we’re sick of the spring metaophors timotheories!

All right, I can take a hint! I’ll dial it back. But not before I make a quick phone call to a beloved franchise that is about to hit *69 on everyone’s landline. #yeahiwentthere

Sure, Spider-man’s new costume is #hype right now, but what about the new Ghostbusters trailer, holy Moses that is getting a ton of internet hate. Especially as it relates to straw-men of gender and race. You’ll want to watch this episode for our thoughts on that pop culture gem alone.

I’ve included a direct link to the full video for you here, but as always the real action is just below for your convenience. If you want to jump right into the Ghostbusters debate, look for the 12:30 mark, otherwise, please sit back and enjoy Episode 3 of Cross Talk!

I’m out of theories for now, but please check back tomorrow for an untitled and unmastered album review. Something completely original, in other words. Please comment, subscribe and share this with you friends. We want to hear your feedback!

Tim!