responsibility

Home Improvement (My New House and Other House Keeping Thoughts)

Posted on by Tim Kuefler

Where I came from, holding a door open for a stranger was absolutely necessary (especially the elderly), and minding your parents wishes at all times expected, but I also had the great privilege of choosing my career path, focusing on creative acts and experimenting with belief systems as I grew up.

A strange combination of conservative Christian roots and post-modern ideals indeed, dear readers.

Now, in case you are wondering what my interpretation of that lifestyle could possibly look like, I’ll start by telling you some of my thoughts on living life. I have strong tendencies towards moral relativism and pluralistic truth-finding, while my creative energy is highly self-referential and irreverent – this is likely why I gravitate towards satire. And satire is best represented in popular culture (in my humble opinion of course). Also, my humour is starkly dry, and I hate injustice of any kind, so satire lends itself well to those values. But on the other side of that coin, I am fiercely loyal to maintaining family traditions, believe in the importance of a cultivated education that never ends, and I will happily defend that etiquette, discipline, and spirituality have their place in properly developing a human being. Even more-so as I step off the singles ledge and into the deep-end of parenthood.

It might seem contradictory to have those combination of beliefs, but I think of it this way, we should carve out what doesn’t work, always holding onto the core pieces that give us structure.

Also, there is an old adage about sweeping your own front door before you sweep the entryways of others, which make perfect sense to me. It’s a universal truth about minding your own business, that we shouldn’t assume to know the first thing about someone. We live in a world today that is very quick to judge or pass judgment on others without looking at ourselves first. We are quick to judge people based on gender, sexual orientation, ethnicity, how they make an income, what their income level is, based on where they live and even based on their past life experiences.

But life is way too involving to waste time and energy on what other people are working through. I really can’t see how you would ever run out of things to do to improve yourself, which is likely why I happen to think of houses as marvellous objects and excellent metaphors for change.

Tool Time

As you may know, I’ve been making lots of changes to this brand ever since I started this timotheories business back in November 2014, and for many, it seems like a natural progression to buy property after a certain period of time renting a space. Many people rent for a few years and then pick up a mortgage when they’ve tucked enough savings away.

I decided to to buy a property too. But I did it because I want to have more freedom over my daily life

Buying a house meant finding a mortgage broker who would approve a loan, searching through hundreds of listings, and then viewing more then twenty of them, before finally making an offer. After I put my offer on the table, I was approved. Which meant I could move forward with the next step – I had an inspection of the property done, I put down a deposit,  worked with my insurance company to set up the house insurance, got the lawyer to draw up some paperwork on the sale of the house, and finally closed on the deal.

As I mentioned already, I bought this particular house for a few reasons, one of which was to convert the bi-level bungalow property into two rental units. And I’ve already started that process by replacing the old furnaces and hot water tank with brand new energy efficient models. You see creative cuties, I want to rent both properties and luckily the house came with two furnaces; furnaces that were 20 years old mind you. So rather then continue a string of repairs and having to coordinate with handymen, I signed up for a lifetime warranty plan and replaced those machines. That way I can just give any heating and plumbing concerns over to Always Heating and Plumbing whenever a tenant has an issue. For free. No surprise bills, and the annual maintenance schedule should help keep them alive for many years.

theories Summarized

I also want to pay off the house faster, and turn the house into a source of passive income. That way, if either Mysticque and I lose our jobs, we still have money coming in which could be used to buy another property, build a studio over the garage of our primary residence, or any number of big expenses. It’s a lot of work, but as I’ve said before, home improvement is essential if you want to make a difference in this world. You work with what you’ve been given, but each of us has an opportunity to improve on what came before, by mixing the old and the new.

And if you can keep up that habit, you’ll find you don’t even have time look at your neighbours house, let alone try to sweep up their front step. Leave that mess to the Jones’ and start planning to put in your hot tub instead. Just a theory to consider.

Tim!

 

Cake Day (Birthdays)

Posted on by Tim Kuefler

Today I decided to write a post about birthdays, and because we’re closing in on the end of my birthday month, its more than appropriate. You know what Lesley Gore used to say right? After all, what is the point of a birthday other than to celebrate the anniversary of your date of birth, also known as your birthdate – the date and time in which you were born.

How birthdays are celebrated vary from culture to culture, and even within certain cultures there are personal traditions to uphold. These celebrations usually involve gifts, parties, and rituals which serve to reinforce the celebration. Getting punched on the arm for every year you’ve been alive came to mind almost immediately for me. Which I hate.

On top of that, many religions celebrate the birth of their founders. Think Christmas and Buddha’s Birthday.

Another item to consider with birthdays is that they help us to establish milestones of life and all of the responsibilities that are conferred to us at those times. Some of them are good, some of them are dangerous, and others are up for debate, literally. For example, the age of consent, voting rights, emancipation, quitting secondary school, marriage, getting a drivers license, purchasing alcohol and tobacco and a host of other doozies. Also, when we reach our governments elected age of majority, minors assume all responsibilities over their lives, and parents/guardians no longer have legal charges to take care of them.

It’s fun stuff.

But let’s consider traditions of North America, because it’s where I live and what I grew up with, okay dear readers? As many of you know, we celebrate birthdays with a party of some scale, including presents for the birthday person, often bringing out a birthday cake/pie/treat at some point during the festivities and topping said cake with candles to signify the persons age. Then we blow out the candles and make a wish – we’re supposed to keep this secret because the wish won’t come true otherwise.

Yeah, I’m calling bullshit on that.

I just turned thirty-two, and I am not married, I do not have children nor a house in my name, I am not a successful author, painter, musician, public speaker, athlete or lecturer, and I am definitely not in the best shape of my life.

And that’s the problem with birthdays, they’re built upon dreams, deadlines, obligations, expectations, and wish fulfillment.

So this year I’m trying something different. A new set of theories and a new mindset – I’m celebrating my unbirthdays and my perpetual state of progress OR being progressive. This is the year of campfire stories, so watch closely, listen intently, and keep close to the warmth of the fire. I’m going to share some more birthday stories soon, and get you in the spirit of the present.

Bad pun, yes. But a better gift cannot be found anywhere.

Tim!

Happy Thoughts (How To Find Happiness)

Posted on by Tim Kuefler

What is happiness anyway? And what does it take to stay healthy and happy throughout our short time here on this spinning rock?

I often wonder about that one dear readers. Well, I think about it constantly if we are going to get down to brass tacks. I keep it on my mind and in my heart in particular for safe keeping.

With so much uncertainty in life and the responsibility to make good decisions it can be challenging to know what to do with the time we have available to us. And because of this uncertainty, it seemingly becomes a lot easier when we delegate our free will to other parties, letting them live rent-free in our heads when we should be taking care of our own shit.

Then we can live like crabs in the bucket.

You see, the well travelled route in many cases is often the least satisfying overall, but it is in our nature to avoid resistance sparked behaviour. Living our lives with a goal of everyone should have the same, and no one can do better, because then you get attacked and shamed.

And you can do it to other people too if you are feeling down ever.

Which is why that old adage of “aspire to wealth and fame, it will inevitably lead you to happiness” is a false one. Sure it is incredibly easy to work “really hard” at a singular focus, especially when that focus is one that makes money. But the results of that behaviour lead us away from what can really produce those happiness results.

Let me elaborate.

There are common career paths that people can take, and often you will find that those paths get applause from the majority of people because they are “safe” and pragmatic. But the reality is that we aren’t all cut out to be teachers, healthcare workers, engineers, accountants, and salespeople. But those jobs are prevalent everywhere, so they get positive attention.

Don’t be confused and think that I disagree with those professions, no I think that there are people who are qualified AND passionate about those areas and should be in those jobs, my concern is that the crab bucket mentality pushes people (especially creative people) who shouldn’t be in those fields to set their standards in the wrong direction.

Which is why it appears to be fun and acceptable to fantasize about wealth and fame. Having money seems like a great way to assure yourself of security in life, and fame looks to yield those results too.

Now if you haven’t had the pleasure of reading tabloids or gossip magazines, guess what many of the people who experience ridiculous amounts of fame struggle with? Relationships and health. The ones who have worked hard on themselves and their full skillset don’t see these issues, but those who limp along, then hit a spot of luck with whatever talent they have aren’t truly ready for the incredible pressure that money and fame put on an individual.

As the Notorious B.I.G. would say, mo money, mo problems.

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So how do you combat that problems of mediocrity and overexposure? It’s simple really, you recognize what your life purpose is and go for that. However much or little time you can dedicate to it, you put that full effort into your day and over time you will find that you are investing your energy into healthy relationships too, because you are naturally happier.

But that’s not it, that’s where we run into the problem of rookie rockstars.

It’s not just as simple as following your life purpose. The kicker is that you have to find a way to build and maintain intimate relationships too.

This video by Robert Waldinger is a pretty solid summary of what I’m referring to.

As a creative type, you will struggle with self-doubt and you will experience people who don’t believe in or undervalue what you are making, but loneliness can be even more toxic then the problems of addictive behaviour. What I mean by this is that you can definitely be in a toxic relationship and feel alone all the same, and avoiding people just because they don’t “get it” won’t help either.

You need to believe in what you are creating, and protect it, but never shield everything for the sake of your craft. As the saying goes, don’t cut off your nose to spite the face.

This balancing act is definitely more challenging, but it is so worth it when you can look back even one year and say to yourself, I am loved and I accomplished this!

What do you think? Is this just a theory? Or is it a theory with some salt? Until next time my friends.

Tim!